T’s 3 Hit Hybrid Opener:Amazing Way To Create Conversation Starters
WHAT WILL YOU LEARN IN THIS GUIDE:
- T’s 3 Hit Approach For Starting A Conversation
- Two Things To Remember When Telling Your Conversation Starters
- Assume Value And Don’t Be Afraid Of Rejections
T’s 3 hit opener is the most effective way to start a conversation with a group or a person as it gives them four opportunities to converse with you when a regular opener gives only one.
This hybrid opener is a process rather than a pickup line or a gimmick. The process is made up of steps that, within themselves, can still open a group but when combined they give three different opportunities for your target to hook which makes for a more fluent and natural opener. Following this process enables you to create amazing conversation starters.
The aim with the three hit conversation starter is that every time you move forward to the next step you look back at the previous step for context. Sounds cryptic I know, but bear with me as there’s an example further down.
Personally I have always found opening to be my weakness. Almost all regular conversation starters had serious flaws in them. I felt that it was awkward going up to women and asking their opinion on something I did not care about. I have had amazing success with opinion openers but situational openers always seemed more natural to me. However they always failed to start a conversation properly.
Conversely, the opinion opener seemed too rough for opening as I like my openers to be more refined and more subtle so I can fly under the radar.
A common problem among all students of social interactions is that they feel that they do not reach the social hook point with opinion opener because once their question is answered the conversation heads towards a natural end. For this reason stories are essential and follow the opinion opener in both sequence and subject.
T’s 3 Hit Approach For Starting A Conversation
1) Situational opener / comment
2) Opinion opener related to situational opener
3) A story incorporating the opinion opener
You start with a situational comment:
You:I’m loving this bar, they have an amazing selection
You then ask her opinion on the topic you just mentioned:
You:I’m looking to try something new, a drink that is a little different, what would you recommend?
You then continue into a funny story that communicates positive qualities about yourself (this helps differentiate you from other average men without bragging) and will be linked to your opinion opener. The story will be partially pre-prepared with funny nuances that will also allow for your situational opener to be slotted in.
You:It’s funny, the last time I saw someone have a Yeager-Bomb was at this mardi-gras party I went to. This one guy was obsessed with them. He looked like Elmer Fudd on steroids, I shit you not he was up to here (use your hands to show he was shoulder height) about 200 kilos and was with this 7 foot blonde woman. He came and sat on the last chair in the whole party so his girlfriend said
( *use highly exaggerated bimbo voice* )
“Like baby can I like please sit down as my stilettos are fully killing my feet” and I swear he turns around, looks at her *impersonate his expression: one of confused seriousness* and without saying anything backhands her to floor. So I didn’t know who to say something to first, him or her because now her left breast fell out of her pink halter top. I went up to him and said
“Hey man, that isn’t cool, lets just relax and have fun ey” and he turns around, this 200kg guy and says *use the highest most ridiculous voice you have* “I treat my bitches how I feel like ok?”.
At this point you will already have gotten a few laughs which not only demonstrates that you are a funny entertaining guy but also lowers her defenses towards you if you are funny and personable. It is important to talk a lot at the beginning of an interaction, as until you have demonstrated something of value about yourself they will have no incentive to contribute. You can then continue the story by saying:
It was the funniest: this guy who smelt like warm beer, covered in tattoos and looked like an over inflated pool toy you just want to squeeze
(Notice the use of visual, sensual and tactile imagery in accordance with an analogy to help communicate to your target on every level and get them even further involved / interested in the story).
He started to go on some roid-rage fit and it just killed the aura of the party, I didn’t want to stay so I ended up just taking my mates back here (the bar you are in).
This story shows that not only do you have ethics and that you can protect women but you also are a leader of men. All positive qualities subtly communicated. Quite often your target will become interested in talking to you and relate a similar experience or make another comment you can continue talking about. If not then instead of asking her a question, talk to her as if she were an old friend. Just make a statement that provokes further conversation.
Don’t you hate it when you’re having an amazing night and one bad apple can ruin the whole vibe?
Notice how this provokes further conversation without having to question them and seem needy, e.g. “Have you ever been at a party where that has happened to you?”
Also you are talking about a broad experience rather than specific facts, e.g. “Don’t you hate it when some short built guy starts getting all hostile to try to impress his girlfriend after you know they have just had a fight?”
This is way too specific and chances are fairly slim that anyone could fully relate to that.
By this time you are usually in a full-blown conversation with the girl and her group of friends. Even though the situational opener might only be to the one person once you start telling your story be sure to get everyone’s attention. Tap them with the back of your hand, make eye contact and/or speak louder and say ‘Hey that reminds me” or “hey guys check this out” etc. Start only once everyone has your attention.
Two Things To Remember When Telling Your Conversation Starters
The last thing you want is another person who isn’t involved to turn away and start a competing conversation, which can suck away everyone you are talking to. If you feel that you need to work to get their attention, emphasize the key words of your opinion opener e.g. I’m looking to try something NEW, could you RECOMMEND a nice DRINK. Spread your eye contact around, make sure you are slightly higher energy than the group is and it is pretty hard to get blown out.
This is an easy opener to use if you are already in the right proximity to the girl / group you are after. If you cannot seem to bring yourself to do this then you can half-open the group before you decide to fully open them.
Assume Value And Don’t Be Afraid Of Rejection
Ultimately do not go out of your way to try to show her that you are of a higher value than other guys, assume that you are of higher value before you start the interaction. This is more potent than any pre-prepared story as it comes out automatically. If you are having issues with this either practice using canned materials or visualize yourself as someone who does have those qualities.
The best way to overcome your fears is to expose yourself to them to such an extent that you become complacent with your anxiety. Becoming good at social interactions is much like going to the gym. Lifting a weight ten times is painful and uncomfortable but is only those additional 2 or 3 lifts extra that you do that build muscle. Sure they are painful and you hate the feeling but ultimately those last 2 or 3 that push you to your edge are the only ones, which contribute to your development.
Remember this when you start your approaches, you will get rejected a lot but you will improve quick enough to reduce how many times it happens. Even the best guys in the world get rejected 10-20% of the time. There are just some people that you cannot talk to no matter how great your conversation starters are. These people might have something important on their mind and just want to be left alone. Realize it is them and not you and don’t be afraid of rejection.
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